Lars

Now Lars was a lumberjacks lumberjack and followed the logging jobs from site to site year long. No sooner was one job done when he moved on to the next. One cold nasty winter he thought that it was time that he settled down and found a wife.
So after the logs were floated down the river to the mill Lars decided to start looking. The walked up and down the streets looking for the right one. When he saw her golden hair,smooth skin, elegant air about her, the daughter of the Parson. Now Lars did not have much experience with women figured all he had to do is walk up and speak his intentions. Well Lars had been in the woods for years and looked more like a grizzly bear and smelled as bad. This young lady would not even give him the time of day.
Now Lars never backed down from a challenge be it man or beast, but women folk were different. Lars decided that he could change. He went to the hotel and got himself a bath, then to the barber for a shave ,haircut and some of that flower water. Then to the general store and got a brand new suit complete with a starched collar and tie and new shoes. As he comes out of the store he runs into the young lady and asks if she would do him the honor letting him escort her to the spring social at the church. She agreed and he said he would pick her up that evening.
Lars rented a horse and buggy at the livery and went to pick up the young lady. As he’s helping her into the buggy. Out of the blue a bolt of lighting stuck Lars. As he’s laying there smoke coming out of ears, he looks up to Heaven and says Lord why me and why now. A voice from heaven says “LARS IS THAT YOU SORRY I DIDN’T REGONISE YOU”